Dude, you need to relax.

So you think you're all cool and not at all worried about allergies. You're sure you're not harboring low-level anxiety at all times.

And then your cell phone rings in your office while you're at work, and it's someone calling from the preschool, and your heart is racing as they're saying, "This is so and so from such and such school, and I'm just calling because..." And you're thinking to yourself, "How fast can I get there?"

Except that all they are calling about is the fact that school pictures are happening on a Monday, but your daughter doesn't attend on Mondays, so you'll need to make a special trip to drop by if you want to have her included in the class photo.

Oh.

Okay.

So, um? No one's dying?

Fantastic.

We'll be there at 8:00.

Oh, and p.s. did you know that you just gave me a heart attack?

(No, I did not say any of that. Was just thinking it.)

Anyway, apparently I need to take a chill pill.

And you wonder why we allergy moms get a little nervous about preschool...

A recent conversation with Georgia (age 2, almost 3), which was brought on by the topic of eating at preschool, and her new allergy alert bracelet:

Me: "So you can wear this bracelet to remind people of your allergies."

Georgia: "Yeah! It will be so great! And then the food will be safe."

Me: "Well....no, not necessarily. The food might still not be safe. You can just eat our food. We'll give you safe food. Because, well, you know...some other grown ups are not quite as good as mommy and daddy at reading the ingredients. So let's just eat our food, okay?"

Georgia: "Right."

Me (seeing a chance to practice): "Does Georgia eat peanuts?"
Georgia: "Nooooooo."

Me: "Or tree nuts?"
Georgia: "Noooooooo."

Me: "Or cucumbers?" (Just checking here, to see if she has any clue what she's saying.)
Georgia: "Nooooooo."

Me: "Actually, cucumbers are safe, sweetie. You can eat cucumbers."

Georgia: "Some people can't eat cucumbers. But we can eat them."
Me: "Um. Yeah. I guess so. But you can definitely eat cucumbers."
Me again: "So, anyway....no peanuts."
Georgia: "Right."

Me: "And no tree nuts."
Georgia: "Right."

Me: "And no fish."
Georgia: "Right. I can't eat fish. Well, I can't eat orange fish. I mean gold fish. I can't eat gold fish."

(Oh crap...this is really devolving. Is she talking about goldfish crackers now?)

Me: "Well, you can eat goldfish crackers, right? Yes. You can eat goldfish crackers, honey. But you just can't eat real fish."
Georgia: "Right."

I think what we can conclude here is that my oh-so-smart two year old may tell you at any given moment that she is allergic to cucumbers and goldfish.